Kang the Conqueror
In business there is a lot said about repeat customers: finding them, recognizing them, and making the most out of their patronage. As has been previously noted (in nearly every post here), I am not a great businessman. Many of my clients are destructive to my studio and many more have a real problem with paying for my services. So, yeah. I’m kind of a crappy businessman.
That said, however, there is one thing I do right, and today I’m going to let you in on my little secret. That secret, my friends, is time travel. Not for me, of course. Here, let me explain.
Every August 20th, my calendar is booked up by Kang the Conqueror. This is a guy who claims to be master of space and time, right? But when there are SO MANY instances of him running around at once, it makes keeping appointments tough. You never really know if you’re talking to the Kang from yesterday, or the Kang from two weeks from now, or a Kang from forty five million years ago! So what I did was, every time Kang the Conqueror (or Rama Tut or Immortus, et all) called for a photo session, my assistant told him August 20th. That way he could just dial his time machine to that day and that time and get his headshots in. While it saves me a lot of headache, it also leads to days like this:
“BEHOLD! I, the master of yesterday’s tomorrows, have arrived for my 9am!”
Then we do it again at 10. “BEHOLD! I, time’s monarch, have arrived for my 10am!”
And again at 11.
And so on, and so on.
Are you alive?